THANKFUL FRIDAY

We’ve made it to the middle of summer and Michael pointed out that he has about three weeks of summer vacation before it is time to go back to the classroom. Every time we see something about back-to-school reminders, the Cabbage groans. They are not ready to start their last year of middle school, particularly since a number of their friends are starting high school in the Fall. Michael and the Cabbage have managed to fill their summer vacation up with equal portions of summer time fun and chores.

It’s the chores part that I am grateful for.

The two of them spent two days last week, moving furniture and rugs to clean baseboards and the floor. The rug in the dining area even got washed. Then they turned their focus to the vehicles, washing the inside and out of Michael’s truck and my car. Michael re-caulked the bathtub and it looks like a professional did the job. This week, while the Cabbage is on vacation with their mom, Michael started cleaning out trash in the basement and took our sparky defunct microwave to a recycling center. All of those things were chores that I did not ask them to do and are not specifically on my list. I have dusting on my usual chore list and that includes baseboards, but Michael doesn’t know that. The only thing I asked of the Cabbage this summer was for them to clean out their clothes, getting rid of things they can no longer wear and their ‘toy’ bins. They completed this early in the summer because they were motivated with the prospect of new clothes.

The two of them did all those extra things along with the general day to day chore list. They made dinner and cleaned the kitchen. The cleaned the bathroom once a week and did the grocery shopping. They started the laundry. They took time each day to pick up their daily clutter. And I’ve pretty much done nothing except finish up the laundry and make sure a weekly meal plan gets made. Well…mostly. I still clean out Rosie (vacuum robot) four times a week and do a round with the broom and vacuum on Sundays. I’m not great at doing nothing. I need to keep some chores of my own. Me having no chores during the summer months has been Michael’s plan for a few years now, but this feels like the first summer the two of them have accomplished so much more than the usual chores.

I am truly grateful for all of the hard work they’ve put in this summer.

Next week the two of them are taking the train to St.Louis. They’ll stay two nights before taking the train home. I’m excited for them. I’m always talking about how I’d love to take the train some place. I could have tagged along, but I thought it was more important for them to do this one without me. Some of my favorite memories come from the times Dad and I traveled together, just the two of us. I desperately miss my dad’s enthusiasm for adventures great and small. Where ever we went, I was just as much in charge as he was. He allowed me to have freedom and to make choices for the both of us. But also it was an opportunity to spend time with my dad when he was at his most relaxed. I believe in those moments I saw his true self and he was goofy but thoughtful. I am a better traveler simple because of Dad.

I’d like that for Michael and the Cabbage, but I also hope they enjoy their well deserved trip.

WHAT WE DO ON THE WEEKENDS

Here was the original plan for Saturday. I would get up and do the weekly food gathering. Then I would go buy new gym shoes, some candy for the Cabbage’s birthday stocking, and some new makeup. After this, I would meet Michael back at the house so we could regroup for lunch. While I was doing all of the above, Michael was supposed to take the camper to the dealership for repairs and stop by Bass Pro for raccoon repellent before meeting me back at the house to regroup for lunch. After lunch, we’d hit up a hardware store and a fancy grocery store before coming home to clean the basement.

Morning went exactly as planned. It was the afternoon that got derailed. The derailing of this plan started when Michael was left unsupervised in Bass Pro. All he needed to buy was Fox Pee. That’s it, but not only did he come home with the Fox Pee, he also returned with a very cruel and inhumane trap and a pellet gun. After some serious discussion that included me suggesting he place his own ‘paw’ into the trap to demonstrate how the trap “doesn’t harm the animal”, he agreed that we should return the trap, but keep the pellet gun. I let him keep his pellet gun. He’s going to shoot at some paper targets and then the gun will go into some safe hiding place and never see the light of day again. Five years later, he’ll be cleaning out some box and find it. He’ll exclaim “When did we get a pellet gun?!?!” It will be just like Christmas for him.

So our afternoon was spent driving out to the suburbs to the closest Bass Pro. Then there was a stop at a sporting goods close-out store, Home Depot and the Price Chopper that sells piñatas and has bulk bins of jalapeños. By the time we made it home, I lacked the energy to do anything in the basement. Which I think was Michael’s plan all along. I believe this is his plan for every Saturday, to drag me around all over the city for unnecessary reasons so that I don’t have time to clean and take care of things around the house. These are things that I end up having to do on a Sunday, usually while he’s sleeping or take vacation time just to stay home and clean. That’s what I’m doing next week. Except, I can take the basement and garage off my list because I did get around to cleaning those spaces on Sunday.

While Michael was sleeping.

Turns out I can accomplish a whole lot of chores while Michael is sleeping.

THANKFUL FRIDAY

Dainty

2 Likes, 1 Comments - Cindy Maddera (@elephant_soap) on Instagram: "Dainty"

Okay. Gratitude. It is the basis for any happiness project self help book you have ever read. Taking a moment of time out in each day to be grateful for something and to acknowledge that gratitude, makes for a happier human. Sometimes it is the 'taking a moment of time out' in the practice of gratitude that is the most difficult. The time portion of things has been my struggle this week. I feel like I have been playing catch up all week. I've been catching up on sleep, emails, and work all while trying to maintain my normal daily routine. Of course things slip through the busy cracks. One of those things can easily be gratitude. 

Sunday, after wiping down all the surfaces in the house, I looked at our kitchen with disgust. It has been a while since I have had time to deep clean that space. The stove was in dire need of more than just a wipe down. The drip pans were beyond cleanable and just needed to be replaced. I looked around the kitchen with slumped shoulders, already tired and unsure of when I would be able to get around to doing a proper cleaning. So, I asked for help. I asked Michael if he could do two things this week: first, order new drip pans for the stove and second, deep clean the kitchen. He did both of those things with out (much) complaint and I am so grateful that he did. I am not good at asking for things like this. When I see that something needs to be done, I just do it. I have to be really overwhelmed before I ask for help. I am thankful that he was able to do this task for me. 

Our summer routine is coming to an end because school is starting next week. I am grateful that Michael took over the daily household chores for the summer. I like to think that this experience helps us do a better job of appreciating each other. It is a reminder to take time out to be grateful for the person standing next to you.