MY LATEST COLLECTION

That kid that looks surprisingly a lot like Chris is still in high school and still part of the drama department. I know this because I watched him stumble his way through a production of Fame on Saturday night. Chris played up his tone deafness and lack of rhythm for comic relief, but would not have ever thought to audition for one of our college’s musical performances. So in a way, I got a glimpse of what Chris would have been like in a musical and it was just as entertaining as you would think it to be. Does anyone even remember that play Chris and Drake Matney wrote together? Chris’s character limped around the stage with toilet paper stuck and trailing from one shoe and his fingers superglued to his chin like the Thinker. Now set all of that to song and dance.

I figure I have about two more years of this kind of torture before that kid graduates or Michael takes a full time drama teacher position at another school.

Any way. It was a lovely evening. I dragged Terry and our friends Jenn and Steve along for the show. We had drinks at Terry’s before hand and Michael, who had been in charge of building the set, told us about a giant mirror they had built to wheel out for some of the scenes. So every time the mirror came out on stage, Terry and I cheered quietly. I think Terry even took a picture of the mirror. We were it’s biggest fans. I’m proud of Michael for doing the thing, making changes in his career that he needed to make to save his sanity. He still complains about his students, but just as much as he complains, he talks about this aspect of his teaching career with excitement and enthusiasm. The next day, we had lunch at a Chinese place. My fortune cookie fortune said “The path to success is often lonely.” and Michael’s said something about excitement and enthusiasm being infectious. They felt like honesty fortunes rather than advice kind of fortunes, but then I called bullshit on my fortune. I said that if you are excited and enthusiastic about the thing you are trying to succeed at, then the people around you will be infected and be excited and enthusiastic in their support of your success.

Maybe I should write fortune cookie fortunes?

The best interaction came at the end of the musical when everyone was exiting the auditorium. I was wearing a green romper with wide legs that could easily fool people into thinking I was wearing a dress. A little old black lady walked up to me and gripped my hand tightly. She said “I just wanted to tell you. I loooove that dress. I think I could look good in a dress like that.” I smiled and replied “Of course you would look amazing in a dress like this, but guess what? They’re pants!” Then I did my little jig that shows off this aspect of the outfit. She gasped and said “Shut up!” Then she leaned in closer and said “Do you want to hear a joke?” I nodded and replied “Of course!” Then she proceeded to tell me a hilarious and inappropriate joke.

What did the black lady’s tampon say to the white lady’s tampon?

We’re both stuck up bitches.

We laughed and then she went on her merry way. Then my friends asked me if I knew that woman. I told them that I had never seen her before in my life. Then I added that this is just a thing that happens to me. I’m magnet. I collect interesting people. And that lady is not just the epitome of interesting. She had a really strong grip for a frail looking woman and stylish in her floral print dress. Now that I really think about it, after reading Karen Walrond’s book Radiant Rebel, that woman defines rebellion. I mean, here is a woman who, despite appearances, is very strong. She’s bold and brash and not timid about speaking her mind. She tells off color jokes to complete strangers! I bet she has some really great off color stories she could tell me too.

It’s encounters such as this, that make me very appreciative of my interesting people magnet.