YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT

Memorial Day weekend, Chris and I realized that we did not have an air conditioner. I don't mean the air conditioner doesn't work. I mean it doesn't even exist. There's no air conditioning unit. At all. No big deal. We've gone with out before. We survived two summers in Oklahoma heat without it at one crap hole we lived in. As long as we can open some windows and turn on some fans we're doing OK. Except we soon realized that only half of our windows had screens. That's OK too because we have a fan that pulls the cool air up from the basement. Who am I kidding. It was hot and humid and the dog was starting to hate us just a bit I think. The heat made us not want to turn on the stove so we headed to the market for some cheap produce. I've had to get over the organic vs non-organic thing for a while. We are on a budget and the way I see it, fresh produce is better than no produce. So we headed out into the heat and crowd of the market and this is what we got for $20.

Not a bad haul. That's fourteen Roma tomatoes, four bell peppers, five nectarines, five peaches, one mango, five grapefruit, seven limes, bunch of mint, carton of strawberries, two onions, two small watermelons and a cucumber all for twenty bucks. I made gazpacho for the first time ever (remember that gazpacho we ate outside that cathedral Chrome? It was that good). I made this super easy hummus recipe sent to me by the lovely Fluid Pudding. Tonight we ate taco salad with lettuce and green onions from the garden. My lunch today looked like I was back on some wacky cleansing diet. Except I'm not. I want to eat this way. Weird.

Last night our landlord took pity on us and brought us a window unit (we're his favorite tenants, dur). The dog slept on the floor in front of the unit last night. I think he loves us again. We could totally do with air conditioning just to prove how tough we are. I'm just sayin'. We aren't wimps. BUT THANK GOD WE HAVE AIR CONDITIONING!

SOUL SEARCHING

It's been well over a year since I made my Life List and since then, I've crossed off seven things. Seems a bit sad. Truth is, I've forgotten what exactly I've put on that list. So, I thought it was time to go through and do some editing. It was good to just sit down and remind myself that I have plans. As I scanned through that list, I realized that those plans I have are not all that unreasonable. There's no reason why I shouldn't be crossing some of this off, but there were a few things that I just know I'm not going to do. Number five became "travel in France" as opposed to "live like a native in France". Let's be realistic. I'm not sure how my life is ever going to get to place where I can up and move to another country (this being said after I've just upped and moved to another state). I also know that I'm never going to be in a play (#38). I am the type that will help you run lines and cheer you on from the audience, but being on stage makes me physically ill. Instead, I will zip line through a jungle or forest any day. Number 46 used to be "try 52 new recipes". Easy enough, in fact it's so easy that I think I've actually accomplished this. I just never kept track of it. So I cut it from the list and replaced it with "jump rope on the Great Wall of China". This is an idea that came to me when Kizz was traveling to China. It sounds fantastic! Also, #59 (run a marathon) had to go. I hate running. I just don't like it. Why would I put something I just don't like to do on my list? I think I replaced it with something very fitting. And finally, #69 - back up all my photos, got hacked from the list because that's a chore. Not fun. It's a thing I should do, not a thing I want to do. It's now "grow mushrooms".

I need to figure out a way to keep better track of things that I do on and for the list. I'm sure I've tasted several new wines, but I never stop to write any of it down. Number 61 (100 new museums) is a bit easier because I take pictures, but until today I couldn't tell you what number I was on. If I'm not careful, these will end up falling to the way side. I bet there's an app out there for managing your Life List. Maybe I need to get it.

Any way. This week? I make some plastic yarn. Momma needs a new rug.

MY WORD OF THE YEAR

The new look for the blog is almost done. There are a few little things to be added, but for the most part things are in place. Every time Chris has brought up the subject of a blog redesign, I've been resistant. I think mainly because the earlier attempts have been long and painful and messy. But this time it's moved along pretty smoothly (for me any way). No glitches and I've been able to keep up with the blogging during the construction. All this change got me thinking. I've been doing this blog thing for almost ten years. I know, I know. You say "but Cindy, the archives only go back to 2005". Well, some of you may recall that some bad shit went down in 2005 and one of those things just happened to be a server error. It ate my blog. I lost all entries prior to the end of 2005. And I am so glad I did. The rebirth of the blog brought a change. It started the Live Life Revolution that I've been chugging along with. We've seen the blog transform from a bitch fest to a sounding board for the good and positive. I'm a little bit proud of that.

I'm not good with keeping up with my blog birthday or number of entries, but 732 posts since 2005 ain't too shabby. And finally after all these years, I've managed to pull together an "About Me" page (Chris chose the picture, I find it hilarious). So, my dear readers (all ten of you), enjoy! And here's to many more happy adventure stories to come.

ATTACK

Chris and I tried a new place for breakfast on Sunday. The food was good, but not as good as our usual place and it was a bit more pricey. And...AND...it gave me food poisoning. Horrible, horrible, food poisoning. There were chills, fever, stomach cramps, aches and pains and lots of whining and whimpering. It was pathetic. It was during one of those "oh my God, I'm so hot, my skin is going to split open" moments when Chris came in to rub my feet and solemnly tell me about Bin Laden. I think I asked him about the how's and what's of it all, but that's about it. And I know there's already been so much said and what I have to say is a tiny drip in the bucket. I really don't have much to say on the matter other then how my feelings on it are very similar to my food poisoning symptoms.

The thing is actions begat actions begat actions and so on. Dwelling on the could have should have would haves gets us no where. I choose now. I choose love. I choose forgiveness. I choose no fear.

And I choose from here on out to always get the Hollandaise sauce on the side.

SIX!

Today our little Quinn turns six. SIX! I don't even know how this happened. I still remember the day we went to the hospital for his birth. They brought him out, all bundled with a cap on his perfect round head, and he squinted up at us with his squinty eye. My heart swelled four times the size in his presence. Now, he's a big boy. It started when he told his mom that he wanted a big boy haircut and he cut all of those beautiful curls off his head. And even though he still comes and gives me a big hug when he sees me walk in the door and a big smack on the lips, I know those days are numbered.

We love you little man.

GARDEN DIARIES, THE EASTER EDITION

I know today is a Garden Diary day, but really there's nothing new about the garden. It's growing and so far there have been no attacks by possums. Instead, I bring you our Easter Sunday. Which has been a very good Sunday with sunshine and cool breezes, punctuated with just the right song in just the right moments. We had bunny shaped pancakes for breakfast. They had blueberry eyes and banana mouths and when Chris came into the kitchen and spotted them, he pointed at them and said "Ha!".

Last night we colored Easter Eggs. You should have seen us sitting at our little table surrounded by pipe cleaners, glue, stickers, and bright colored fuzz. As each egg took on it's monster alter ego, we would begin to giggle. They are hilariously funny.

Hope your day was as sweet.

AMENDMENT

So... the cleansing diet. That was supposed to last a week, but with our emergency trip to Tulsa, it got tossed out with the bath water. That's OK though because those three days of the diet were good. Well, except for that one part on Tuesday. Sometime around 3 in the afternoon, I started getting the worst headache. And by the time I made it home, I was in pain and a bit woozy. Chris decided it was because I'd had all carbs and no protein. I disagree. Quinoa has protein and I ate a lot of quinoa. A lot. I came home that day and collapsed on the bed and instantly fell asleep. While Chris made dinner, I dreamed that there was an elephant standing on my bed waving her trunk over my head. I dragged myself out of bed and ate a HUGE salad with beans and mushrooms and felt normal again. Wednesday was good, and I probably should not divulge this next bit, but I don't care. Wednesday I pooped five times. FIVE TIMES! Good healthy poops and three of those times happened at work. At work! I don't poop at work. It just isn't done.

So, Chris and I declared the cleanse a success. I had my own little vision quest and cleaned out my system. Maybe next time I'll have all the knowledge I need to avoid the day two crash.

SPRING CLEAN

I decided that I needed to step it up a notch this week and do a cleansing diet. We've had major pig-out weekends ever since we moved up here. It seems that I just can't get enough pizza, pasta...food. Last week I was feeling sluggish, couldn't get out of bed, and my yoga practice suffered. So, with the pantry low and in dire need of a re-stock, I thought now would be a good time for a cleansing diet. I stuck with one that I had done before, one that requires no gimmicks or starvation. You just follow five easy rules:

no animal products no caffeine no sugar no alcohol no gluten

Sounds a bit daunting, and I admit, the first time around with this diet all I saw were the things I can't eat. Not exactly the best attitude to have. There was no wonder that by day three, I was a snarly, cranky, prickly pear of a person. Looking at the diet now, I see all the things I can eat.

Really, I've only had to make a few changes. I tend to eat this way (usually) any way. The biggest adjustment has been to breakfast. I've been eating two Morning Star Soysauge patties with breakfast every morning for some needed protein (shut it Chris), but unfortunately these things contain gluten. Also, I have a nice little routine of stopping by the (free) espresso machine at work every morning. But these are easy fixes. Instead of soysauge, I make Chris get up and make me a protein shake. Instead of coffee, I stop by and get some herbal tea (also free).

I am a bit drowsy today, but that probably has more to do with all the sitting and reading I've done today. I could have taken a nap when I got home, but I didn't. I fixed a lovely skillet dinner of mushrooms, tomatoes, bok choy, and quinoa. I scrubbed the bathroom and I wrote this entry. We'll see how the rest of the week goes, but so far, I don't feel like I'm on a "diet". I feel like I'm just eating clean.

GRACE

I'm sure by now everyone here knows that Chris and I are not religious. That's not to say that we are not spiritual. I personally believe in something, something that makes all want to be good and kind and loving. I just don't like giving it any sort of name or label. But recently we've started saying (OK, by "we" I mean me) grace before eating our evening meal. It started last week when I cooked our first meal in the new place. I mean really cooked. Not just opening a can and heating up something on the stove. Cooked. As in chopped vegetables, sauteed and simmered stuff. And here is where I run a little off course to tell you about our table. Stay with me; this goes somewhere. The week we were here looking for a place to live, Chris and I found a little table at a junk shop that we thought would be perfect for our new dining area. We even found chairs that would work with it. So we said we'd come back for it the next week. We went home, packed up stuff, found a vintage side table I had picked up at the flea-market a few years ago hiding in storage, loaded all into a truck and headed this way. We went back to the junk shop to get the table...and it was gone. Then Chris said "Wait! That table! That table you bought!". And he was right. The flea-market table turned out to be perfect. And the chairs we had spotted the previous week were still there and they fit perfect too. Get it? That other table was gone because we didn't need it. Oh Universe.

So back to that first meal. We set the table and sat down with our little plates of fresh salad and bowls of homemade soup and it all looks so wonderful. So wonderful that I look at Chris and said "I kind of feel like we should say grace over this meal". He replies "You wanna say grace? Say it". So I did and it's stuck around, like it's something we do now. It usually goes something like this: "Dear Whoever, Thank you for this lovely meal we are about to consume. Thank you for the many blessing we have and friends and family we love. Please watch over them and keep them safe. So say we all". Chris added that last bit.

AND NOW BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAM

And the internets? We have it! I mean, I guess I could have gone to the library at work and done a few things, but really? I just haven't had the time. The new job is great, but it is requiring a lot of adjustment. I'm sure once the shiny-shiny of the place wears off, I'll be able to relax some. You know those decisions you make in life where you're not so sure it's the thing you really want to do, but you do it any way and then do what ever it takes to make it kind of work? Like putting a square peg in a round hole. I've made plenty of those over the years. I've just trudged along doing the things I should be doing instead of the things I want to be doing. I can honestly say that the choice to move to KCMO for this job is not one of those decisions. From the moment I said "yes", things have just fallen into place. I have never felt more secure in a decision. It's a very odd feeling.

Also, I had no idea that Kansas City was so awesome and has so much eye candy. So many great photog opportunities that I may even start up another 365 day project soon.

Get the flash player here: http://www.adobe.com/flashplayer

TAP, TAP...TAP, TAP

I know there are people in the Internet world flipping out because I haven't been blogging. I'm really sorry about that, but it seems we won't have Internet in our house until Friday. Our house. It's a moderately fine house. The more time we spend in it, the more we like it. We are getting settled, figuring out new everything, and getting used to new routines. And unlike previous moves, there are no regrets with this one (with the exception of how much crap we have, so much so that we had to leave the V behind for the next trip. I hate being separated from the scooter!). Of course, we miss our friends like crazy and we have so many new things we want to share with you guys. It's an adjustment. An adjustment that hasn't been really too hard to make. We bought booze on a Sunday. We bought two loaves of organic bread for what we usually pay for one. Tonight we're celebrating our 13th or 14th anniversary (we can't do math right now and neither one of us remembers which it is) by eating pizza and chocolate fondue at this really neat little place called Ingredients. We are happy.

And full. Very, very full.

CONVERSATIONS WE HAVE

Conversation 1:Me: That cow only has three legs! Chris: Are you telling me they're eating that cow a leg at a time? Me: *blink*

Conversation 2: Chris: We should totally put this in with the Christmas stuff for the Nativity scene. Me: Oh yeah! That's perfect! Chris: OK then. See if you can find a place for Han and Chewy in the Christmas box.

Conversation 3: Chris: OK. How about this? We take this load up, pull it all off the truck. Come back here that night. Get up the next morning. Take the other car in to have the battery replaced and new tires. We then drive those cars back to Kansas City. Then I come back and get the rest. Me: So what you're saying is we have a duck, a bag of grain and fox we have to row them across the river? Chris: I want to shoot the duck and the fox and set the row boat on fire.

CONVERSATIONS WITH MRS. SWAN

Me: We're going to the Vietnamese store. Ya need anything? Mrs Swan: Get the noodles with the picture of the two Reagans on it.

Me: Reagans!?

Mrs Swan: Yay, Reagans

Me: Reagans. As in President Reagan?

Mrs. Swan: Yeah. No. Yeah. I mean like a snake.

Me: Dragons?

Mrs. Swan: Yeah. Reagans.

Some things I just won't miss.

THANKFUL FRIDAY, MONDAY EDITION

I realize that I didn't post anything for Thankful Friday, and there's really no excuse. I had plenty of time to write something up while I waited for a seriously over worked plumber to show up. I admit, I felt a bit lazy and of the mindset that "these people know what I'm thankful for". And while it is true that many of you could probably guess that I'm thankful for the new job, many of you couldn't guess that it is you I am really thankful for. You and flushable toilets. Everyone we've told the news to has been so happy, so encouraging, so willing to help in any way possible. It's a reminder that we are loved and have some of the best people in the world as our friends.

From the moment we decided to say yes to this new adventure, a calming peace just washed over me. I know I should be freaking out about finding a place to live, packing and moving and all that jazz, but I'm not. I'm just ready and I think if I was flipping out, taking the job would have been the wrong decision. I am thankful for the peace and clarity of this moment.

Also, I am thakful that there is no longer sewage backing up in the tub and toilets.

CHANGE AND I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THE JINGLY KIND

Today I quit my job. I have never quit a job before. I've been laid off. I've been in a lab that's shut down. But I've never left a job on a voluntary basis. Until today. Remember that interview thingy I was talking about earlier? Well, they offered me the job and with out hesitation, I accepted. And I just now glanced over at today's Italian phrase for the day which says "Che progetti ha, what's your plans?". Appropriate no? After the shock and flipping out stage, I came out of my savasana this morning with a lightness I haven't felt in a really long time. And yes, I know this will be hard and confusing and stressful because we have a very short time to find a place to live, pack and move. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. The new job is in Kansas City MO. This is were we can mark number 3 off the life list. Despite all that moving and starting over stress, I am happy. Very, very, very happy. I feel like this was the easiest decision to make. I think that since it was so easy to say yes to this job that every thing else will just fall into place.

So, that's that. Big crazy changes headed this way. I bet you could see this grin from space.

NOTES ON BEING MY AUTHENTIC SELF

It seems I kind of fell off the interweb world. The problem was that I just had too much rambling around in this brain and most of it I couldn't talk about and some of it I probably shouldn't talk about yet either. The gist of it is that last week I had a job interview. That interview was supposed to happen on Wednesday, but got moved to Friday because of the weather. They flew me out for the interview and they made me do a presentation. When I found out they wanted to fly me out for the interview, I balked. When they said they wanted a presentation, I panicked. My body reverted to the old stress habit of head cold/sinus infection. When they had to postpone due to weather, I breathed a sigh of relief. Those extra few days gave me time to wrap my head around everything and calm myself down. By the time Friday rolled around, I was still snotty and congested, but I wasn't nervous. Not even when my plane had to sit on the runway an extra thirty minutes before take off because of snow. I arrived late to a whirl wind of activity, meeting with this person and that person. I was open and honest. When I didn't know the answer to a question I said "I don't know". My presentation rocked the house. I was my authentic self. And you know what? I feel really good about that.

I don't know if they'll offer me the job and I don't know yet what all that will mean for us if they do. I do know that I'm good with what ever comes our way. I am at peace. I am who I am and I'm very much OK with all of that.

THE BIG FOUR OH

Today is Chris's Birthday and as every one keeps telling us, it's a big one. Turning 40 is apparently a life changing event. But you know what? This morning when I looked over at him to tell him "happy birthday", I couldn't see anything different.

He's still the same funny, smart, kind, dorky, romantic, silly, sweet, sexy, wonderful man I married. I hope he enjoys his day and I wish for him to have all his heart desires. Happy Birthday Love.

OUR DOG HAS OCD

So I went to open the back door to let the dog out to potty, but soon realized that I would have to dig our way out the back door. I went back to the bedroom, put on my galoshes, scarf, hat, gloves, yes, still in pajamas, and headed out with a shovel to clear a path for the dog. Path cleared, great. Dog can pee. This is Hooper's usual patrol route. Once he has completed that path, he feels comfortable coming back inside. The snow had other ideas. Because of the way the house is situated, the wind swirls the snow around so that it drifts closer to the house. See all that middle section there? Not much snow. Right behind the house? Lots and lots of snow.

So, here's the scene. Dog goes out and stands by door until you go out too. Dog waits a minute to be sure you are also staying outside and then cautiously hops his way over to the fence. Dog is able to make his usual patrol. Dog is happy, while you freeze your ass off. Great. Except, now the dog has disappeared around the side of the house and is taking forever. You give up and sneak back inside, even risk taking off the galoshes. Husband calls dog. No dog. Husband calls dog again. No dog. WTF?

I out the galoshes back on (for some reason, I'm the only one in this house with some what decent shoes) and trek back out to find that our dog is trapped by a snow drift. And because it would cause his poor little brain to explode to figure out that he has to go back the way he came, I have to dig him out. The dog is now snoring at a my feet.

I THINK I MIGHT BE ALLERGIC TO TEQUILA

Friday evening, Chris and I finally made it home from a long day at work (long week really) and we started right into making our dinner of left over potato soup and grilled cheese sandwich. While the soup warmed up on the stove I made us up some margaritas with clever margarita kit my pal Robin gave me for my birthday. Robin's recipe is 3 parts tequila, 1 part water, 1 part lime juice, and 1 part agave nectar. Robin is an alcoholic (I say that with love). They are very tasty and very potent margaritas. Any way, we're eating and drinking and watching Red and folding clothes. And I realize that the more margarita I drink, the more my eyes get itchy and my sinuses get stuffy, but I ignore it all because did I mention that the margaritas are tasty? And potent? So I spent the weekend battling with my nose and a nice little allergy attack. And today? Today I woke up with a canker soar the size of Texas on my tongue. I'm thinking it's either the agave or the tequila and I'm leaning towards the tequila, because that's a new alcohol to us.

So I guess this means that tequila goes on the list with avocados. That means I will still consume it, but that I am aware that my body doesn't like it. My yoga teacher used to tell us that every thing is about choice, just be aware of all the consequences of that choice. Meh. I can live with the canker soar.

WHATZ UP

I've got nothing really to blog about. Well, that's not entirely true, but that story has to stew a bit. So instead I thought I'd do a long over due entry about my iPad. Hey! Everyone look at my iPad! It's shiny and cool and fancy pants!

I knew I wanted this thing. Really, its the only new technology thingy that I've ever really wanted. But after I got it? Meh. It took some getting used to. It took some time to really appreciate the greatness that is the iPad. For instance, I am currently writing this entry on the iPad.

But wait! There's more! Something I really really like are the magazines. I have three magazines that I subscribe to and two of those are on my iPad. The magazines are almost interactive. If you touch a link, it goes to that website. There's no clutter. No torn out recipes roaming about. The same is true for books. Except Chris has put me on a leash about buying books since last month I bought too many. But whats too many really?

It gets better! Now I have a card reader that let's me upload my pictures straight to iPad and then to my flickr account. Ha! My laptop is getting dusty.

I should have titled this the power of redirection.