THE RUSH
Cindy Maddera
Saturday evening, I was finishing addressing Christmas cards while we watched Bullet Train, when Michael said “why haven’t we received any Christmas cards?!?” I paused to look at him and then responded with “Slow your roll. It’s only the third day of December.” Though, I do have to fess up and admit to feeling a little anxious about how time is flying by and it does sort of feel like Christmas is tomorrow. With the exception of some stocking stuffers, I am done with all of my Christmas present shopping responsibilities. There’s really nothing left for me to do but sit back and celebrate.
Except that’s not how my brain works.
Instead of just soaking in the joys of the holiday season, I’m already planning ahead for 2023. In fact, I feel as if I have already projected myself into the future. Kelly approached me last week to discuss co-teaching a yoga workshop in January. She asked me if I was qualified to teach continuing education hours and I had to go the Yoga Alliance website to figure it out. Turns out I have been doing this yoga thing long enough that I can now teach continuing education hours. I am a little bit floored by this and I am suddenly very aware of how my whole yoga teacher side gig may morph into some thing bigger in the next year or so. Since moving to Kansas City, I’ve had a fairly laisseze faire attitude towards teaching. I have been hesitant to accept teaching opportunities and strict with my imposed rule of teaching no more than two classes a week. I am committed to maintaining some teaching boundaries, but at the same time I might be ready to stretch out my boundaries.
Currently, the wheels in my head are turning around how I am going to fit the anatomy of the shoulder and hips, all the yoga strap modifications to support those joints and an hour of asana with a yoga strap into a three hour workshop. Then those wheels set in motion other wheels in my head on my future creative endeavors. I want to pursue some creative stuff, but I also don’t want to burn candles at both ends. How much do I really need to fill up each day and still leave room for rest. Because rest is the thing I really should be focusing on in this present moment. I am still sick. I have woken up three mornings in a row with a sore throat/ear situation and it is not from sleeping with my mouth open. I have the chew mark lines on the inside of my cheeks to prove it. It’s fine as long as I can peel myself out of bed. Once I’ve showered, used my Neti pot, and downed a shot of DayQuil, I’m good to go. I can get through the day with lots of lemon, honey and mint tea. Until sometime around 3:30. That’s usually when you’ll find me curled up under my desk at work.
But it’s fine.
Really.
I have yet to get around to erasing November from our dry-erase calendar and filling in all the things for December. I plan on sitting down this evening and doing this activity. I kind of have a feeling that just the action of acknowledging that the month of December is happening will anchor me more into the here and now. December is not a leap month. It is a month that deserves to be savored as we celebrate all the good things the year has brought us and reflecting on the not so good things. It is a month for soaking in as much light and warmth as we can in order to sustain us through the next few months of darkness and cold. It is a month for me to throw a stick into those turning wheels in my brain. My focus for this week is to do the bare minimum.
I might be able to manage that.