THE FOOL, THE REVERSE THREE OF CUPS, AND THE SIX OF RODS

Alex stared up at the blue sky through her sunglasses while lounging in a pool float, her hand moving languidly back and forth through the water. It was still morning and early enough in the day for Alex to have the hotel pool all to herself. She pulled her cup from the built in cup holder on the float and took a long draw of orange juice through the pink straw. She leaned back and just floated. Alex was good at floating, and not just in water. Alex had been floating her way through life for as long as she could remember, mostly floating her way through boys. She just sort of drifted from one thing to the next, never really making an effort at much of anything.

Alex had been a straight A student all through high school and college. She did the assignments. She took the tests, but she did not study or do extra work. Her education had been easy, but only because she stuck to the basic and average classes. After graduation, Alex found herself working at a company doing data entry from 9-5. It was not a glamorous or exciting job, but it paid the bills, provided health insurance and was very simple. Alex just typed in information all day. When the work day was complete, she left her cubicle and the work stayed there. Alex did not think about her job outside of her job. She did not analyze how she handled this or that or how she could improve at her job in order to get a promotion. Alex didn’t really care. She was apathetic about most of her life. It was apathy that landed her with boyfriend number one, Josh.

Josh was a sweet guy who was into backpacking, rock climbing and mountain biking. Pretty much all outside extreme adventure activities. Alex met Josh at a local bar when he bought her a drink and asked her to dinner. Having nothing else to do, Alex had agreed and by the end of the next week Josh was taking her to REI to be fitted for her very own backpack. They spent most of the day getting her kitted out for her first backpacking adventure. Alex had never even been camping before, let alone backpacking-wilderness camping, but Josh sounded very excited whenever he talked about it. So she assumed that she would probably enjoy the activity almost as much he did. When they finally went out for their first camping weekend together, Alex was certain she was going to love it. An hour into their hike to their campsite, Alex’s feet hurt and she had to pee. Her pack had rubbed blisters on her shoulders. Alex was having to work at this and she was not having fun. When Josh informed her that there was no bathroom, Alex turned right around and hiked herself back to the trail head parking lot. Later, Alex was surprised how much of her gear REI refunded for her.

Alex had continued to float and drift from boyfriend to boyfriend for a number of years. Boyfriend number two had been very political and many of their dates centered around protests or marches. Boyfriend number three was really really into live heavy metal music. Alex spent most her time standing with her hands over her ears while boyfriend number three thrashed his body around the audience. Boyfriend number four had been very serious and they had attended multiple lectures and book club meetings, most of which Alex slept through. Boyfriend number five…Alex couldn’t even remember much about boyfriend number five. He was uneventful and if she thinks about, they both just kind stopped calling each other.

This brings us to boyfriend number six, Eric. Alex took another sip of her orange juice, now watered down with melted ice. Eric was the reason she was in this hotel. Eric was the reason she was spending her morning floating in this pool. Eric was the reason for a number of things.

THE KING OF PENTACLES, THE EIGHT OF RODS AND A REVERSE EIGHT OF PENTACLES

Carol raced through the airport, her small carry-on rolling behind her with it’s wheels rattling. She arrived at the gate of her connecting flight just as the words “cancelled” flashed up onto the over head board. Carol, panting and out of breath, placed her hand on her hip and bent over slightly to catch her breath. “Fuck.” she swore on a exhale. She pulled her phone from her bag and checked the flight status app. Nothing until tomorrow morning. Carol was stuck in Detroit. The earliest flight available was a 6:15 AM flight. Carol stepped up to the counter to make sure she would be able to get on that flight. A man in a business suit stepped up next to her at the counter and Carol gave him a side eye. “I think the line starts behind me sir. Not next to me.” Carol said as the man’s elbow bumped her shoulder. “Oh sorry…I didn’t see you standing there.” The man stepped back as one of the flight attendants stepped up to the counter. Carol looked at the woman’s tired face and her name tag. “Candice, it looks like you’ve had a rough day too. I know this sucks for you.” Carol put on a smile and tried her best to look sympathetic. Candice nodded wearily and asked how she could help. “Is there any way I could get a boarding pass for that 6:15 morning flight to New York?” Candice typed on the keyboard in front of her and shook her head. “The earliest I can guarantee you is 8:45 AM.” Carol nodded and replied “Put me on it!” Candice typed a bit more and printed out a boarding pass. “Thank you soooo much.” Carol said as she took the boarding pass being handed to her. She gathered her things and turned away from the counter. Then she started searching for a hotel room and scored a suit at closest Marriot with points from her travel card.

As Carol made her way to the hotel shuttles, she felt a little despondent at spending another night alone in a dreary hotel room. She paused at a take-and-go kiosk and pondered the questionable salads and sandwiches. Then she shook her head and decided to treat herself at the hotel and order room service. The hotel shuttle was waiting for her when she stepped out of the airport. Carol hopped on, dragging her carry-on bag and sat quietly as the shuttle made it’s short drive to the hotel. At check in, Carol ordered a salmon burger, fries and some tonic to be delivered to her room. She had two airplane bottles of gin in her purse. She opened the door to her suit and kicked off her heels as she walked into the room and then face planted onto the bed. Eventually she rolled over and pulled herself up to a seated position. She pulled her laptop from her bag and connected to the hotel WiFi. Carol had already filed her report for the consultation she had done for UWM, so she opened a browser window to scroll through beach properties. This was becoming Carol’s new favorite pastime. She found that she could spend hours looking at various condos and bungalows for sale in places like Hawaii and Florida. Carol knew that this new obsession was a sign that she was burnt out and tired of this hectic life that consisted of airports and hotels.

A knock at the door signal the arrival of the room service she had ordered at check-in. She got up and answered the door. Carol let the attendant into the suit and managed some small talk as the young man rolled in her dinner tray. She tipped him and then shut the door behind him. Carol rummaged in her bag and pulled out one of her little gin bottles and made herself a gin and tonic before tucking into her meal. She scrolled through house listing while she ate until she came across a cute little bungalow on the island of Maui. It was not directly on the beach, but nestled back into the jungle across the road from the beach. Three bedroom, two bath, with a carport. Carol scrolled through the images for the listing. The interior looked fairly new and in good shape, but the front porch and back patio were the things that peaked her interest the most. Carol could picture herself sitting on that front porch with her morning cup of coffee. She could see herself puttering around in the gardens around that back patio.

Carol wanted this house.

Carol opened a second tab in the browser window and logged into her bank account. She looked at the balance in her savings and then she looked at the purchase price of the house. She could do this. She could buy this house easily. The next question was if she bought this house, what would she do about a job? She had a sizable nest egg, but she wasn’t any where near retirement. She would have to get a job. Carol thought about this as she munched on a french fry. This job of her’s could be done remotely. Maybe not with the current company she worked for, but she could freelance. Carol took a drink of her gin and tonic and then clicked on the link to contact the realtor selling the property. Then she started making new plans that did not include being stuck in a airpot hotel in Detroit.

THE NINE OF CUPS, THE TWO OF CUPS AND AN UPSIDE DOWN ACE OF RODS

Tarot fiction today

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Andrea ran her sleeve under her drippy nose and sniffled as she poured the last of the wine from her second bottle into her wine glass. She plopped back onto her couch and blearily flipped through her photos on her phone. “Delete, delete, delete. F you delete.” Andrea slurred as she tapped each photo of Jason mugging for the camera, selfies of the two of them kissing at sunset, dancing at Freddy and Alex’s wedding. They were all lies and she wanted to erase every trace of Jason from her life. “Meow.” Andrea turned her head to see Felix sitting on the arm of the couch. The room spun a bit as she tried to focus her gaze. “Oh, Felix. You knew Jason was rotten on the inside the whole time. You never liked him from the start.” Which was true. Felix would hiss at Jason and then run from whatever room Jason was occupying. She reached over and scratched her orange tabby behind the ears.

Andrea couldn’t figure out how it had all been so good and was now so so bad. She had been so sure that Jason was the one, that they were meant to spend the rest of their lives together. Andrea had been duped and she was angry at herself for falling for the idea that this could be her happily ever after. She should have known from the beginning that Jason was too good to be true. He’d greeted her with a bouquet of spring flowers outside the restaurant where they had agreed to meet after a brief conversation through the online dating app. Andrea had been surprised and flattered at his thoughtfulness. She had been on a few of these online dates already. The first date was never really a ‘date’ as much as it was a meet-n-greet. This was the date where you decided if you wanted to go on a real date together. Andrea had expected to wait at the bar for Jason to show up half an hour late. Then they would have two drinks where she would pay for her’s and maybe even his because of some made up wallet fiasco. They would stand outside the bar and agree to do this again or to go to dinner and a movie. Then Andrea would head back to her cat, Felix, and delete the number from her phone.

This first date with Jason was not at all like those other dates. He had arrived before her and had flowers. When Andrea suggested they just have a drink at the bar, Jason said “Oh…I’ve already gotten us a table. I thought we could eat and linger over our food and wine.” Andrea shrugged and agreed. She had even let him pull the chair out for her and scoot her back in. They ended up sitting for what seemed like hours, taking turns telling life stories and getting to know each other. Afterward, Jason had walked Andrea back to her apartment. They stood outside on the stoop and instead of just saying that they’d like to do this again sometime, Jason suggested they both pull up their calendars and set a time for the following Friday. As the week passed, Andrea started to worry that Jason wouldn’t show, but was leery of sending any kind of text. She didn’t want to come across as too needy or insecure, but Jason buzzed her apartment four minutes before their agreed time. He took Andrea to a concert at the park where they sat on a blanket with a picnic. When the concert ended, they remained on that blanket talking until three in the morning.

Things moved in a whirlwind fashion after that. The two of them seemed inseparable. Jason spent more and more time at Andrea’s apartment. They went to company outings together, introduced each other to friends and family. There were vacations and camping trips. There were minor quarrels with great make-up sex. They talked about moving into together or buying house together. They talked about a wedding on a beach. Andrea was in love and she had thought the feelings were mutual, but it turned out that she was wrong. Andrea was at the Farmer’s Market, picking out veggies for a special dinner. Her plan was to surprise Jason with a nice meal. She was just turning from one vendor when she saw him. Andrea paused to be sure, but it was clearly him. With his arm around the waste of a pretty petite blond woman. Andrea felt her heart leap to her throat as she watched him laugh at something the woman said and then lean down and kiss the woman on the lips. Andrea stepped back between two stalls, her heartbeat racing. Then she turned and fled the market.

Andrea didn’t remember how she had gotten home. Her brain just kept replaying the scene over and over. Maybe she had been wrong about what she had seen. Maybe that really wasn’t Jason. Andrea had dug her phone out of her bag and sent him a text to remind him of their dinner plans. Jason responded with a thumbs up emoji. Emojis were not really his thing, but Andrea shrugged this off and went inside to get dinner started. By the time Jason arrived, she had calmed herself with a few glasses of wine. She kissed him at the door and then led him to the kitchen. She laughed as she poured Jason a glass and handed it to him. “The funniest thing happened today at the Farmer’s Market. I could have sworn that I saw you there. The man looked just like you, except he was kissing some blond woman.” Andrea lifted a pot lid and stirred the sauce she had simmering on the stove while eyeing Jason from the corner of her eye. Jason took a long sip from his wine glass and then cleared his throat.

“Well…the thing is…” and then Jason started telling Andrea everything. He had met Janet around the same time he had met Andrea. Jason had been seeing both of them during these last six months. “I just can’t decide. You both are so great and I just don’t know what to do.” Andrea calmly set her now empty glass down on the kitchen counter, looked Jason squarely in the eye and said “Let me help you decide.” Then she showed him out of her apartment. Andrea leaned against the door and sobbed. Felix sat down beside her and started cleaning his face with his paws. Andrea got up from the floor, found a kleenex and blew her nose. Then she went to the kitchen and threw the dinner she had made into the trash. She grabbed a second bottle of wine and her glass and then wandered into her living room. Andrea’s phone was sitting on the coffee table. She could see text after text flashing across her screen. All from Jason. She ignored them and proceeded to get stupid drunk and talk to her cat.

Andrea continued to scratch Felix behind the ears. “Felix, you’re the only man I need.” Then she passed out, fully dressed, on her couch.

THE ACE OF CUPS, THE ACE OF RODS, AND THE QUEEN OF RODS

What sort of tale shall I weave from today's reading?

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Agatha stared out the carriage window at the passing forest scenery, her rosary clutched tightly in her hands. She closed her eyes and tried to let the sway of the carriage sooth the rising panic that threatened to boil up and out of her. Agatha opened her eyes at the sound of her brother clearing his throat. Theo looked her directly in the eyes and for the twentieth time asked “Agatha, are you sure you want to do this?” Agatha studied her older brother. Theo was the middle child, free of the responsibilities of the oldest male heir but with a promise of a life full of all the benefits bequeathed to males. He was already in the process of acquiring a fine education from a prestigious university. Agatha thought of the classes he was taking and the things he was learning and felt her current rising panic shift over to make room for jealousy.

“Theo. This is the last time you will ask me that question. All of my choices are grim. I can stay and have father marry me off to the highest bidder, I can join the convent and devote my life to God or I can drown myself in the river. Devoting my life to God seems to be the least grim of choices right now.” Agatha turned her head to once again look out the carriage window.

“But what about Eric?” Theo asked.

Agatha felt a pain in her chest at the mention of his name. How long had she loved him and he her? From the very beginning, when they were still very much children. Those were the days when Agatha was still allowed to run wild and free, playing rough and tumble with her brothers and the village children. Eric’s father was in charge of the stables on the estate and once Eric’s chores were finished, he would run to meet them in the fields, usually hauling a giant basket of fruit, cheese and bread packed up by one of the kitchen maids. Everyone would stop in mid tussle at the first sighting of Eric’s blond curls bouncing up the ridge and all would cheer with joy. Then we would all race to meet him and attack the basket of food. Eric always plucked the best plum or apple or pear out of the basket and would present this perfect piece of fruit to Agatha as if he was gifting her a jewel. Agatha would give anything to go back to those carefree days and forget all about the complications of growing up.

“What about him? What do you think? Do you think father is going to allow the stable boy to marry his daughter? Do you think Eric and I can just ride off into the sunset together? Don’t be naive. Though I will love Eric until the day I die, I am resigned to the fact that there is no possible future for us. I’m doing Eric a kindness by joining the Sisters. Remaining there where he would have to watch other men pawing all over me would be a torture. Or having to witness me marry another man, a man he knows that I will never love. Can’t this driver go any faster!” Agatha banged the ceiling of the carriage with her fist in frustration and yelled “Can’t we go faster?”

Agatha and Theo felt a jolt as the horses picked up their pace. She nervously rolled the beads of her rosary between her fingers. Agatha knew that her absence could be discovered at any moment. She had no doubt that her father would send his soldiers to drag her home. They could not touch her once she was enclosed behind the walls of the convent, but right now Agatha was in serious danger. She knew that if she were caught, her father would not just force her to come home. He would devise a cruel punishment for her to endure while he contemplated marriage contracts. Agatha also wanted to hurry because she feared losing her nerve. A cloistered life may sound easier than a life married to some troll of a man, but she had no doubt that sisterhood would pose its own set of challenges.

Agatha stared out the window. The carriage had left the forest behind and entered an open landscape. In the distance, Agatha could see the tall spires of the chapel surrounded by a tall wall. She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. Agatha immediately threw the word ‘prison’ from her mind and replaced it with ‘opportunity’. This would be a place where she would find ease and comfort, be filled with content by hard work and the love and support of her fellow sisters. Joining the convent was the only way that Agatha could take control of her own life. Agatha crossed herself and brought her rosary to her lips, finding comfort in this simple ritual as the carriage continued to make its way down the road.

THE EMPEROR, AN UPSIDE DOWN SEVEN OF PENTACLES, AND THE FOUR OF SWORDS

Today's fiction

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The Emperor: A mature man with conviction and the ability to execute plans and ideas; maintains an overview of all situations with stability, control, and reason. The Reverse of the Seven of Pentacles: Anxiety over economic status. The Four of Swords: Spiritual retreat, solitude and repose.

This week’s cards had me playing the ‘What if’ game and wondering what today would look like if we had a president who had taken this seriously from the very beginning.

“Mr. President! Mr. President! What about the impact of the infection rates?” the reporter yelled across the room, over all the other reporters yelling out questions.

“Sorry, son. You’re going to have to save that question for the doctor. I am no expert. What I can tell you is that I have gathered the best virologists, epidemiologists, and other specialists and they are working day and night on figuring this thing out. I have signed an executive order to release emergency funding for research and development for testing and vaccines. I am putting a Stay-At-Home order in effect immediately to control the spread of the virus. This means non-essential personal are required to stay home in oder to minimize the spread of the virus. If you do have to leave, you must wear a mask and maintain a distance of six feet from others. Follow all of the guidelines for minimizing infection as described by the CDC. Wash your hands. Sanitize common use areas. The White House website will have information updated daily, maybe even hourly, on timelines, infection rates, and death rates, as well as frequently asked questions regarding travel, quarantine and the virus. Look. I know this isn’t going to be easy. Our economy is going to suffer. People are going to be jobless. I have also signed executive orders to provide for those in financial need. I believe in our scientists. I believe in our country. We are going to beat this, but only if we take precautions now. I’ve said enough. I’m going to step back and let the doctors and specialists answer the rest of your questions. Thank you.”

The President exited the briefing room to the roar of the reporters yelling out questions and the flashes from cameras. As the door closed behind him, he leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes. He felt his stomach twist with worry and anxiety. This pandemic was going to get worse before it got better. He was sugar coating things when he said that the economy was going to suffer. The economy was going to take a hit not unlike the Great Depression. Unemployment was going to sky rocket. All he could do was pray and hope he had taken action quick enough to minimize the damage and control the outbreak. The President felt a nudge and then one of his aids said “Mr. President?” He waved the aid off and replied “just give me a minute.” He closed his eyes and said a silent prayer for all of the healthcare workers, the people who were suffering with the virus and the families who had lost loved ones. Then he nodded and headed to his office to continue working on strategies to get his country through this.

COMFORT AND FIGHTING MY WAY THROUGH THE MUCK

Today's cards

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I drew three cards: The Five of Pentacles, The Knight of Pentacles and The Three of Rods. Then I carefully read their descriptions. I looked at the three cards again and re-read the descriptions, but I could not figure out a way to spin them together into a tale. Probably because they were sitting too close to the now. I stared at them, long and hard and asked myself “where’s the story here?” The cards rang with a truth. You see, The Five of Pentacles represents the spiritual warmth of comfort to those in financial or physical need, like a blanket wrapping around you protecting you from the cold. Her opposite side is disorder and chaos and ruin. I feel like many of us are barely keeping ourselves wrapped up in that blanket. All it takes is for that blanket to slip from one shoulder or pulled free of one toe for us to feel the disorder, chaos and ruin.

The Knight of Pentacles, well, he’s a hard worker and he’s responsible. He has skills to get a job done, but he can also be idle and careless. He can become motionless, stagnant. I am the Knight of Pentacles flipping back and forth between hard working and stagnation. I’ve made some careless mistakes, like not anticipating the amount of coffee I would need every day. The regular old drip coffee maker is no match for a fancy espresso machine. I can’t even say that the hot mug of joe I drink every morning these days is comparable to the Americano with a shot of espresso that I would drink at the office. I might as well compare apples to oranges. They’re both a fruit. That’s the only thing they have in common. Idleness comes over me and I struggle to shake it. I was used to getting up and standing at my desk or walking the building. Now I pace through a 750 square feet of space while my dog follows me around carrying one of her stuffed animals.

That brings us to The Three of Rods, who offers great spiritual strength to someone contemplating what lies ahead. The reverse of The Three of Rods confuses me. It is “the end of trials, disappointment and trouble. I find that I want both of those things. I want the strength to contemplate but I also want all the trouble to be over and done with. Except this can be true for any time period in life. We get through this moment, only to be faced with a different set of trials, something else that must be contemplated. It’s just one big loop-d-loop. The Three of Rods is always with us whether we draw the card or not. It does not go unnoticed by me that the descriptions for two out of those three cards contains the word “spiritual”. Comforting our spirit. Strengthening our spirit.

I intended to mine these cards for creativity. So the story goes like this.

There was a great plague that swept over the land. It forced people to stay at home and venture out very rarely for food. A decree was issued that people must stay at least six feet apart. Families and friends became separated by this invisible germ wall. Working from home and homeschooling became the thing everyone did as opposed to the few who already had this life. To say that it was a great shock and struggle for many, is an understatement, but the people found ways to interact with each other. They colored uplifting messages with chalk on the sidewalks for those passing by, at the appropriate distance of course. They placed stuffed animals in windows for little kids to spot while they were out on their daily walks. They cheered out their windows for the hospital workers, who worked tirelessly to aid those stricken with this plague. The people found ways to see and visit with each other with a magical window called Zoom. There were many Zoom meetings, happy hours and birthdays. While they found some comfort in these things, they also worked hard at stopping the spread of the plague. They wore masks, washed hands, sanitized counter tops and mail and they maintained their distance from each other. All of that hard work started to pay off and little by little the doctors saw fewer patients. Then one day, they saw zero patients. The land was declared to be free of the plague and the people all went back to the way things were before.

The story the cards told was one I’ve already heard dozens of times. It is a story of overcoming trials and tribulations. I have told so many different versions of this story that I have lost count. But some stories are worth reading over and over again, especially on those days that just drag on and on and you don’t see an end in sight. Some times you need to remind yourself that there is an end to this loop. It just might be too far out at the moment for me to see it clearly, but if I put on my glasses, I can just make it out in the horizon.