HOUSEKEEPING

Yesterday, Michael and I rode our bicycles over to Kelly’s for some camp prep stuff. Then we rode our bicycles to a new ice cream place that just opened on Troost because bicycle rides equals ice cream time. On our way home, we were pedaling up a fairly steep incline and normally I would not be having a good time, but because I now have pedal assist the incline was easy. I just pedaled up the hill. Then I passed Michael and I said “Okay….I like my bicycle now.” The E-bike was not an immediate sell for me. The sudden increase in speed when you pedal took a whole lot of getting used to and I felt wobbly on previous rides. Sunday’s ride was different. I finally felt comfortable. Maybe this will be my two wheel ride to work vehicle while I wait on the next scooter. See? Things are already looking up. I’ve received some very important text reminders that joy is not a thing; it’s a feeling. I have all of the things that V taught me.

Last night I had terrible dreams. They were all versions of Chris’s last few weeks with us and in each one, I would start sobbing. My sobs would wake me up. I would change positions, fall back to sleep and start all over again. I finally crawled out of bed Monday morning with a stuffed up nose and puffy eyes. I looked at my swollen face in the bathroom mirror and said to my reflection “Enough.” I’ve had enough of this moping about. Camp Wildling starts for me on Wednesday and even though the weather forecast predicts rain for most of the time and the temperatures are going to be down right chilly, I am ready for all of it. I want to be in the woods with my camp friends no matter how soggy it might get. Laughter and joy will keep us warm.

What I learned from June camp was that accessing the internet or getting any kind of cell signal required standing at the top of the hill, near the entrance and holding the phone above your head. So, I am not even going to try to post while I am away. I’ve backed my new journal, my new pen (both of these gifts are from Karen as part of the Lightmaker’s Team) and The Lightmaker’s Manifesto. I’m going to bundle up and snuggle in close to a fire pit and do some thinking about the whisper I hear every time I pick up this book and what that whisper means in regards to activism. My goal is to return from camp a little bit wiser, little bit rested, and a little bit more joyful.

Have a great week everyone!