IT'S OH SO QUIET
Cindy Maddera
This last week was not easy. There. I've admitted it. There's a song out there somewhere that I can't remember off the top of my head right now, but there are lyrics in it about feeling everything. This last week I felt everything. Every negative, hateful word even if not directed to me, I felt it. We hear all the time to let go, to not hang onto things we can not change. We pay money to have our bodies massaged to release tension. We sit in meditation, attend yoga class all in practice of letting go. Holding onto negativity and stress is bad for the health. It weakens the immune system. I'm usually pretty good at letting go. Years of practice have taught me to discern the important things to hang onto and the things to throw away. I wouldn't say I have thick skin, more like reflective. But sometimes refraction happens and those words pass through at a different angle and wrap themselves around the inside of my body and I feel them. It happens.
So, I stepped away from the blog for a bit. I stepped back from a lot of things for a bit and I allowed myself to feel all of it. And I realized that at the end of the day, even when I feel weighed down with the yuck of this world, I can and will tell you that I am fine. I can honestly say that I will probably never tell you that I am not OK or that my glass is half empty. My glass is always half full and here's why. Weeks like this one remind me to dig deep for the good because the good is still out there, it's just hiding. It's playing hide and seek and it's my turn to seek.
And now, I can begin to let go.