I went to bed last night while Michael watched a large crowd of protestors walk south on Main towards a line of police officers. This was our third night of protests in KCMO. Saturday night got a little rough and violent. Windows were smashed (by young white male protestors) in the Plaza Area. A cop car was set on fire. Protestors were treated to tear gas and rubber bullets. Last night went a little better than the night before, but only slightly.

I am disappointed.

This sounds simplified, but really I have no other words. I am not qualified to lecture on racial discrimination in this country. I am a privileged white woman who naively believes that your voice and story matters and has value no matter the color of your skin. I see other white people around me and shake my head at how they have fallen for this rhetoric of fear that we have been taught over the years. Fear thy neighbor. What a stupid and ridiculously short sighted way to live a life. I also shake my head at those who think this is only about police brutality. There is so much more to this than that. So. Much. More. I keep seeing that video of the cop kneeling on George Floyd’s neck. We are watching a man die in the video. We are watching the life seep out of him and for what? What was his crime? What did this man do that was so horrible to have a police officer crush his windpipe? There were FOUR other police officers there and NO ONE stopped Derek Chauvin from killing George Floyd. They just stood by and watched this man die. If you are not disgusted and outraged by this than you have no place calling yourself a human being.

Enough is enough.

White people, stop going to these protests to instigate riots. Go to these protests to support your neighbors. Educate yourself on racism in this country. Support black business. Write to your community leaders about being sure that your law enforcement has de-escalation trainings and body cameras. HOLD EACH OTHER ACCOUNTABLE! When you read stories of discrimination happening at a place of business, contact that company. Tell them you won’t support that company unless they do something about their racist employees. Read books written by people of color. Donate to the NAACP or the Southern Poverty Law Center. Just be the person who would have shoved Derek Chauvin off of George Floyd. Just be the person who would do the right thing.

Racism is a pandemic all on it’s own. It does not follow the current rules of the COVID-19 pandemic. It doesn’t give a fuck about social distancing or wearing a face mask. Racism will take more lives than the COVID-19 virus. While we wear our masks and maintain our distance from each other to protect one another and pray for a vaccine, we still wait for a vaccine against racism. Stop waiting and just be the vaccine.